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Monday, May 22, 2006

My crime

I was in college then, n he was one of the best friends I had. The kind who remembered to involve me in everything the gang did, who helped me all he could, in whatever whacky way I asked, who accepted me as I was, without getting critical.
He was the best friend one could ask for, for support, to stand through thick n thin, to have fun n to hang out with.

But I wasn’t all that. All my college life I tried to fit in to the rest of the gang, in with time it did give me a lot of identity crisis. At times I would try to prove to others and to myself that I was cooler then the rest, and believe me, it could get pretty weird!

It was one of those fits in my final year. Overconfidence and pride had taken me to the height of being conceited. In one of my pathetic deeds, I lied to him. It was about a girl I knew through him. And he found out my lie. I will never forget his face when he finally confronted me, it was not just anger, he was genuinely upset. And I was still conceited enough to not care.

Its been more then a year since then. I have apologised t him a number of times, but I guess that wasn’t enough. I guess it takes a lifetime to build trust, and as I found out the hard way, you get just one chance.

After college we went separate ways, and in the one year sinc college ended, life has taught me a lot. More than once I have thought about this incident, and felt insanely guilty and ashamed, but I didn’t get a chance to say it.

Dear Amit, if you ever read my blog, consider this a public apology or a account of guilt, just know that I am really sorry. Even if we never meet again in life, remember I treasured your friendship as I still do, and if could get just one chance in life to turn back time, I would.

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